1. Take one hot concrete step. Get one pair thin pants and one pair nylon undies. Combine pants and undies. Sit on step and bake at 95 degrees for one hour at your nephew's graduation. Yield 2 hot buns. Burnt buns to be exact. Exactly 2 red, burned butt cheeks. Ask your husband to rub aloe lotion on and serve.
Recipe compliments of my sister ;)
2. If you SWEAR TO GOD that you will only go in and buy the baby boy gift for your daughter's pregnant teacher and not a bunch of clothes for your daughter at The Children's Place....well ... you are going straight to hell.
3. There is only one style of bra, in the entire Victoria Secrets store, that does not have padding. And it is $45. Let's see- plain bra with no padding, twice as much? What is up with that?
4. If you buy a manga cartoon kit for your boys, you won't see them for 2 hours. how convenient at times.... They will draw cartoons that combine killer bees, rock stars, pet stores and ninjas. All in the same strip.
5. You can and will be corrected on the lyrics while singing "Laugh Cuckaberra, laugh cuckaberra" by your five year old.
6. She sings better than you.
3 comments:
Victoria's Secret should have bras for us survivors. The last time I was in there, the girl tried to tell me that I should fit me "smaller boob" for the cup size. I tried to explain to her that a cup size B and a cup size D really are too different to try that. She was oblivious.
Sorry about your hot cross buns!
My daughter sings better than I do, too. And she's happy to point out my grammatical mistakes when I'm talking. I thought I was the editor.
HA! M, you crack me. Really you do. I had no idea about the VS bra, but sadly I am not suprised!
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